The New Beyonce? Hmmm….

24 10 2011

In a word, no.

As music lovers here at GFC Headquarters, we can’t help but respect Beyonce. But our admiration grew even more, as she completely stitched up one of her fans at a recent concert.

This was the fan’s biggest moment of her life. Face to face with her icon. Her idol. Her god.

And then Beyonce made her sing. It sounded like a cat being neutered.


Mass brawl (s) and raked faces

20 10 2011

Two football posts in a row? What is going on?

Anyway, bizarre occurrences in the Asian Champions League semi-final this week, as Suwon took on Al Saad. With Suwon 1-0 down, they were pressing for an equaliser. A ball into the box was cleared, but the striker attacking the ball ended up having his face raked by the landing foot of the defender. It looked nasty and needed treatment.

How did Al Sadd respond? Booted the ball up the other end of the pitch and scored…

Cue a mass brawl.

Then cue another mass brawl…

You’re the ref – what would you do?


A header from your own half

26 09 2011

Here’s something you don’t see every day. Jone Samuelsen scoring a header…. from his own half. Effort!


20th Century Fox on a flute

22 09 2011

In the absence of anything meaningful to say, I just thought I would share something that made me laugh today…


A lesson in kickboxing…

15 09 2011

We like sport here at Goldfingers FC. All sport for that matter. So we like to showcase as much diversity as possible.

With that in mind, today we bring you a feature on kickboxing. it is a sport that requires strength, speed and undoubtedly accuracy. It’s a shame no-one told these crazy Russians…

Or did they???


Heineken’s Champions League adverts

13 09 2011

I promised you we would return to football after the Back To The Future bonanza of last week.

Have noticed that Heineken has launched a load of ads today to supplement its Champions League sponsorship. It’s enlisted the services of Gianluigi Buffon, Rene Adler, Patrick Vieira, Clarence Seedorf and Ruud Van Nistelrooy and made a load of opera themed ads. I guess this reflects that Champions League music – you know the one… doo doo… doo doo doo…. THE CHAMPIONS…. doo doo doo doo.

GFC’s verdict: Like the dramatic ones, like the penalty, but not so sure footballers are suited to humour… Look how unfunny this blog is for proof.


Goldfingers FC 2 – 1 Croydon Red Star

12 09 2011

You know what it’s like. You wait and wait and wait for something you have missed for so long. And then suddenly, it’s here and it’s gone for an indefinite amount of time. Like The Boneyard for Kenwyne.

After a hugely long summer, with no tournaments to keep us busy, Goldfingers FC were back, as their assault on the Premier League (of Wimbledon) commenced. First up, Croydon Red Star. Who play in blue. Obviously.

Would the pre-season training have any impact? With a new boss at the helm, GFC started with a new look 4-1-2-3 formation. Paprazzi Darryn Lyons started in nets, Cranners and Weird Ben at right and left back respectively, Liam and Rudd in the centre of defence. Dewesrat occupied the holding role with Pano and Berry ahead of him. Kenwyne started out right, while Phil caressed the left touchline like a convict holding a piece of soap (no australian reference intended). Little Diamo started up top. A bench of Leroy, Rob and Kano looked on wistfully…

New manager Mark Pemberton thinks of his starting line-up

The match got off to a stirring start as Weird Ben nearly gave GFC the dream start as a floated ball from the right met the marauding enigma, who headed downwards. CRS’ keeper did well to get down low to his right to prevent what would have been the bizarre buffoon’s second goal of the season.

The match settled and soon GFC’s pre-season started to show. The ball was being stroked around the back more fluidly than the keynote speech at a “BackDoor Convention” (ask Weird Ben). Comms from Rudd were clear and the full backs were able to get forward. The pressure was getting to CRS a little and their number 10 soon lashed out. #handbags

The breakthrough soon came. A long throw from the Cranager caused chaos in the box. Phil had the opportunity to finish, but thought it would be a better idea to sit on the ball. Fortunately the Panotron was on hand to bundle the ball home.

GFC looked comfortable – CRS had had only one real chance, which was skied over the bar. Two more great chances came our way. Berry got to the byline and pulled back. Little Diamo controlled well and laid into the path of Weird Ben. Again. Buoyed with confidence, he decided to hit it off the outside of his boot. It didn’t go in. Minutes later, Phil played a sweet ball to Diamo, who elected to lob the keeper, who was on his way out, but it went wide.

However, disaster soon struck. A speculative ball through was played by CRS. Paparazzi Darryn Lyons, fresh from his Celebrity Big Brother stint, was always first to it, although had to leave his area to get to it. He duly got there first, and put his boot through, only to pile the ball into Liam’s gut. The ball fell nicely for the striker, who was able to roll the ball into the net.

It then started raining a bit, so Diamo went off to cover his clothes. #prorities

CRS were never really in it in the first half and they were lucky to escape a booking when Phil was upended. It looked as though the half was going to end even, but Dean Kiely lookalike, Peter Dewes, had other ideas. Picking up the ball 30 yards out, he just lashed at it. He hit it harder than you would hit a ginger stepchild. It flew through the air, smashed the back of the net and restored our lead. 2-1 at half time.

The second half was a much scrappier affair and there genuinely wasn’t too much to report. Leroy came on for Phil and we were reminded of two things very quickly. A) the gunt, which duly controlled the ball within about five minutes and B) he blazed over from five yards. Fortunately, this was caught on film and recreated using the power of 3D TECHNOLOGY… The last two seconds of this film could not actually be more accurate:

More chances came and went, the most notable being when Berry was denied from six yards and from the resulting melee, Kenwyne scooped onto the bar from four… Kenwyne and Weird Ben made way for Rob and Kano, but the match ended 2-1.

A strong performance, but should have been more. Lots of positives to take and, at the end of the day, three points is three points though, bitch.


The teaser is explained…

9 09 2011

Lone Pine Mall. Quotes. And the Doc…. Lovely work Nike…

(I promise we will get back to football next time)


Another Back to the Future teaser…

8 09 2011

Teaser from Nike… they haven’t actually made the shoes, have they?


The Doc is back…

26 08 2011

We all know how much of a fan Goldfingers FC is of Back to the Future….

So when this Argentinian ad popped up, we were very excited.

It’s bizarre, but the Doc, the Delorean and “Great Scott” will never get tiring…