Punching above your weight…. The Top 5 Tudors

6 10 2010

In our team, we have one player, who shall remain nameless, who is sometimes cruelly referred to as “Tudor”. The reason behind this is that he is married to a lovely lady, who these harsh critics believe is significantly easier on the eye than he is. The fact that he is sometimes known as The Ogg Monster does little to dispel the neutrals’ thoughts.

For those that don’t know who Alex Tudor is, he hit the headlines in 2003 for hitting 99 not out as a nightwatchman against New Zealand. For a bowler this gave him a ridiculously high average and therefore was “batting well above his average”.

Now yesterday, I was reading the story about Crown Currency Exchange collapsing and I saw a story on the BBC about a couple who had had their wedding dreams dashed and it gave me the inspiration to do a top five Tudors. In the interest of fairness, I have split this between male and females:

5. Wayne Barton and his fiancee Stacey

Anyone got a grand?

From the aforementioned BBC story on Crown Currency Exchange. Apparently they have lost £1,000 on their wedding to Disneyworld. Wayne is 29 and Stacey is 21 and he proposed two years ago. It’s fair to say that Wayne realised very quickly he had to get a ring on her finger. Rumours are that Nuts and Zoo will come in for the £1,000, in return for a favour obviously….

4. Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony

Me gusta Hennifer Lopeth....

The only woman to win FHM’s Sexiest Woman twice, La Lopez has remained an absolute beauty for years. Yet, she is married to a man, who was easily cast as slimy spiv in Man on Fire with Denzel Washington. I guess he does a lot of charity work…

3. Mark Webber and Ann Neal

Bless, he brought his mum to the races...

Mark Webber currently leads the championship in the sport of Playboys, Formula 1. The glitz and glamour. The pit girls, the girls on the boat at Monaco, Lewis going out with Nicole Scherzinger. It’s all there. He’s at the top of his game and I’m not embarrassed to say this… He’s a handsome chap. Yet when “partners” are invited to the pit lane, the first reaction is “Aaaahhh, he’s brought his mum…”. Am sure she is lovely though.

2. Salman Rushdie and Padma Lakshmmi

Fatwa this!

Best known for his slightly controversial tome “The Satanic Verses”, it’s no wonder Salman is smiling. He’s undoubtedly a very intelligent man, but no wonder he is smiling. She’s an actress, model, tv host…. etc…

1. Michael Mols and his wife, Mrs Mols

One of the fitter girls at Ibrox...

Could only find the one picture, but it’s a beaut… nothing else to say really…

To all the Tudors out there, we salute you


(I am clearly a Tudor too)




3 responses

7 10 2010

Irony of all ironies, the original portrayer of the Ogg Monster, Stephen Merchant, is batting way above his average. Just type “Stephen Merchant girlfriend” into Google.
Call me the Ogg Monster, call me the Sherminator, Shermie or Sherman, I still got the girl!
Yours having been sent back from the future to make love to beautiful women.

11 10 2010
Goldfingers FC 1 – 2 Claremont « The Goldfingers FC's Blog

[…] break, Ketchup forced a good save out of their Keeper, who really was another definition of “Tudor“, as we saw at The Hope later. 2-1 at half […]

15 03 2011

That’s Mol’s wife? When I met him a couple of days ago I secretly wondered what his wife would look like. He wore a wedding ring, and, behaved. I Imagined his wife would be another boobs on a stick but not anything like the Mrs Mol here. There must b something deep that’s holding them together.

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